The Porno
by Evil Computer
Summary: In dire straits, Hermione goes to Luna to talk about working a new type of job.


Here is a one-shot that I wrote. I hope you enjoy it. Also, keep in mind that the Harry Potter franchise belongs to JK Rowling and no profit was made while I was writing this fanfiction.

Smut/Lemon warning! Please be aware that the plot of this story forced me to make some ooc characters, so if that is a trigger for you, look away! If not, enjoy.

I was a fool.

I was a fool to think that I could both work my job and study wizarding law, to save money, and win my divorce case with Ron. I was a fool not to ask for help when I realised how skilled Ron's lawyer turned out to be. If I was not so stuck up to prove that I was the smart bookworm who could handle everything at once I would not be in the situation I find myself now in: broke, without a job, and about to see Luna for a job that I never thought I would get into.

But the past is the past. I cannot dwell on it for too long unless I want to become crazy. I need to satisfy my current needs which includes getting enough money to keep a roof over my head, get some food to eat, and keep a somewhat decent style of life.

Once I applied some make-up and got into a nice set of clothes, I used some floo powder to get to my interview at Luna's place.

When I arrived I was welcomed with Luna's warm smile.

"I didn't think you would come" said Luna

"I haven't worked for two months, I live in a single apartment in central London, and I lost 85% of my savings to Ron in our divorce, I don't really have a choice, I need to accept any job I can get" I replied

"That has all been widely publicized by the tabloids, so I know that" replied Luna "What surprises me is that you want to get this job despite the… well let's just say the deviance attached to it."

"Ya, I would say being a pornstar is considered to be a pretty deviant position" I replied "Can we just get to the meat of what this job would entail?"

"Well I have to first inform you that you will not be a pornstar, but rather the star of one video" explained Luna "As you are considered famous the distributer that I am working with is willing to pay you sixty thousand gallons, equal to about one year of your former salary with the ministry, on the condition that we can distribute the film as 'Hermione Granger's authentic sex tape' and you will admit to the tabloids that it was you in it."

"But if I do that I will never find another job! No offence to your choice of career Luna, but I don't want to be tied with the sex industry for the rest of my life!" I exclaimed

"My distributer was expecting that you would say that" mentioned Luna "Our counter offer is that you let us tape you and we distribute it as 'possibly Hermione Granger's sex tape' and you can deny its authenticity, if you want to."

"How much would you pay me if I accept that deal?" I asked

"Since we would make twice money if you authenticated the sex tape we can only offer you thirty thousand gallons if you choose this version of the deal" answered Luna

"I can work with that amount; it should be enough for me to comfortably survive while I find a new job" I said

"That's great to hear!" exclaimed Luna "Now you have to go through the standard procedures that any of our girls have to go through"

"What does that procedure entail?" I asked

"Don't worry it is really quick and we will start it now" said Luna

"That doesn't answer my question" I replied

"Well I am going to need you to strip so I can inspect your body and find out if your body is up to our standards"

"What do you mean 'up to your standards' isn't your whole selling point that I am Hermione Granger?" I asked

"What I am looking for is that you don't have any sexually transmitted diseases, among other things, which would, by wizarding law, make it illegal for us to film you" replied Luna

"Okay, then let's start" I said unenthusiastically while dropping my cloak

"Do you want me to help you get out of your dress?" asked Luna

"Sure" I said seeing no reason to decline her help

Luna unzipped the back of my dress and let it drop to the floor, leaving me standing only in my bra and panties.

"I just want to inform you that it is expected that you will keep your armpits, arms and legs shaved" said Luna

"Okay" I replied before taking off my bra. I then took a deep breath in before dropping my panties, marking the first time I had ever been naked in front of another woman before.

"So you will also need to shave your pussy for the taping. To be honest, you should just shave all of your hair except what is on the top of your head." stated Luna "Do I have your permission to do my inspection in your vagina?"

"Sure" I replied

"I will need you to lie on the couch then" said Luna

"Okay" I replied and complied

Luna put on a glove and shoved two fingers down my vagina. I moaned in shock. She then moved her fingers around, seemingly to try to touch every part of my vagina.

Once she was finished she took off the glove and then took out her wand and shot some purple sparks at it. The glove turned green.

"So you are clear of any sexual diseases" explained Luna "and you can put your clothes back on."

"That's great!" I exclaimed as I rushed to put on my clothes back on.

"One last thing" mentioned Luna "You are expected to memorize this script, which is subject to change"

"Okay" I said while grabbing the scroll "May I ask, who is my co-star?"

"Well since you are such a high-profile star, we are going to match you with our most popular male pornstar, Neville Longbottom!" explained Luna "That is unless you would prefer a script where you sleep with one of our female pornstars"

"No, I am fine with Neville" I said never once before imagining that I would sleep with Neville

"So I will meet you on Friday at 11am here to shoot the porno?" asked Luna

"Ya, I'll see you then" I replied

On Friday morning I woke up in a cold sweat. Despite knowing all my lines down to a tea, I was still not mentally ready to make my first sex tape.

I got out of bed stripped, took my shower and made sure that I was completely shaved to the standard that Luna asked me to be about a week ago. I then got dressed in some comfortable clothing knowing that when I arrive to the set they will make me change into their chosen costume.

I used the floo network to arrive there where I was once again welcomed by Luna's warm smile.

"I am going to need you to follow Lavender who will put you into your costume and will do your make-up" requested Luna

So I followed Lavender to the back room where she presented me with the outfit that I was to wear for the start of the shoot. It was a nice date like outfit, as it was a white button up shirt matched with a black skirt. For obvious reasons I had to have the top few buttons of the shirt undone to show my cleavage. Once I finished changing, I was asked to meet Lavender in the powder room where she would apply my make-up.

When I arrived at the powder room Lavender motioned for me to sit on a chair so she could start her work.

"Are you nervous Hermione?" asked Lavender "Most girls are right before making their first porno."

"I want it to be clear that this is my first and only porno" I replied

"Sure" said Lavender "But that does not tell me if you are nervous or not"

"I guess I am a little nervous" I replied

"You know the tabloids will slut shame you, they did that after Neville and Luna's first sex tape was released" said Lavender

"I know, but in this case I can deny being involved at all, so hopefully the whole initial frenzy will die down pretty soon" I replied

"All done!" exclaimed Lavender

"Really that fast?" I asked in surprise

"I might not have been an A student at Hogwarts but I do know my make-up magic" said Lavender "Now get out, they will soon need you on set."

I walked down to the set to meet Neville, who was wearing black jeans and a plaid button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up. I had to admit he seemed to have been working out since his Hogwarts days as he didn't look half bad.

My new-found admiration for Neville did not last long as Luna said "So this will be the door you will be entering through, and since you have each memorized the script you know where to go on from there. Remember even though this is a 'hidden camera' shoot make sure you expose yourselves in a way that camera will always see what is going on, as we cannot move them. Do you understand?"

"Yes" said Neville and I simultaneously

As we got into position I looked around and was surprised to see how similar the set looked to my actual apartment. We got to the other side of the door only to hear Luna yell "Action!"

As scripted Neville and I entered into "the apartment".

"Thanks for dinner" I recited

"Well thanks for inviting me for tea" said Neville

"Well I really enjoyed our first date and I just wanted to continue our conversation" I said "What type of tea would you like?"

"Earl Grey" Responded Neville

I then used my want to boil a kettle of water poured it in two cups and added some teabags. I then handed one of the cups to Neville.

"Thanks" he said "So now that you have had time to think of the movie, did you enjoy it?"

"It was alright" I recited while sipping my tea "It follows the same old tropes that most romantic comedies do today"

"What do you mean by that?" asked Neville

"What I mean is that it is always about that dumb female character who is generally in desperate need of a man and can't see love when love is looking at her straight in the face" I recited "In real life, the women are in control of the men"

"Explain Further" said Neville

Then, as the script required me to do, I gave him a deep and 'passionate' kiss.

After a few minutes of kissing Neville says "I think I understand what you mean." He then picked me up and carried me across the set to the door of the bedroom.

"Cut!" yells Luna

Neville puts me down and we each walk to Luna to talk about the scene.

"So that was great!" said Luna "Hermione you really need to remember to show more passion and secretly engage more with the hidden camera especially when your clothes start to go off in the next scene."

"Okay" I simply replied

"As always, Neville, you were perfect" Luna said as the two then embraced into a real passionate kiss.

We then moved into the bedroom set. It looked almost exactly like my real bedroom, where I have brought guys to before. This was different from my real apartment though, as this is where I was going to be recorded for the first time without my clothes on and having sex. Neville picked me up again, for continuity reasons. I took a couple of deep breaths to get ready…

"Action" Luna shouted

Neville then carried me over and laid me down on the bed. We started our make out session again and following Luna suggestion I added in a few extra fake moans, to make it seem more sensual and sexual. Then, as the script required me to say, "Oh, Neville, we really need to do something about that hard cock of yours" while unbuttoning my white shirt, to then shift to the camera to show the audience my bra for the first time.

I then undid his jeans and pulled it down along with his boxers while he unbuttoned his plaid shirt to get fully nude for the camera. I then started to give him a hand job.

"Let me see your beautiful tits" requested Neville

"Okay" I replied while slowly removing my bra, making sure that the camera got a good view of my naked upper half.

I then put my lips around his dick and started to slowly bob my head back and forth, giving him the scripted blowjob.

"It feels great, babe" said Neville "Go a little faster"

In reply I went a little faster, before long he was full face fucking me.

"Oh, yeah!" moaned Neville "Keep going at this pace and I will be cuming soon"

As the script instructed, I went faster and sucked harder to make sure that Neville would actually cum in my mouth.

Before long my hard work paid off and Neville stated "I'm going to blow" and a few seconds later his warm white liquid filled my mouth.

I then swallowed his cum and recited "It tastes so good" despite cum being one of the worst tasting things ever.

"Now it's time for me to pleasure you" said Neville

To allow Neville to eat me out I had to do the last bit of stripping for the camera. I turned around to slowly pull down my black skirt so the camera got a good view of my shapely ass. I then let Neville pull down my panties and spread my legs across the bed so the camera could get a good shot of my pussy.

Once that was done, Neville brought his head down and started to lick my pussy. To be honest, this was the first time I ever let a guy eat me out. Although I liked to try new positions with Ron, he was only really interested in getting a blowjob and pounding my pussy before going to sleep. But having my pussy explored by Neville's experienced tongue felt great. I never really had to fake a moan for the camera as I was finding that I was actually enjoying myself. I soon gave into a nice long orgasm. As Neville licked up my juices I started to become nervous, soon we were going to shoot the scene that all the tabloids were going to feature, the actual sex portion of the script was up next.

Neville then muttered a spell making a magical condom appear on his dick that is invisible to both the camera and the naked eye. He kept my legs spread as I lay on the bed and he stood at the bed's side, he then inserted his penis into my vagina. I never had sex in this position before, but I assumed that it gave a better view of the action to the camera. Sadly, it was not as pleasurable as missionary or girl on top. But Neville still tried to pleasure me while starting slow and eventually speeding up his thrusts. I tried to position myself in a way so I could produce an orgasm while also faking my moans.

As the pace increased and the sound of his balls slapping against my shaved vagina met the pace of my heartbeat. Soon Neville couldn't hold it back and cummed into his magical condom.

He pulled out and kissed me to say "Let's try another position"

"Okay" I recited

"Is there a position that you want to try?" asked Neville

"Do you want try doggy style?" I tried to ask sexily

"Hell yah!" replied Neville

I turned around onto my hands and knees while Neville changed his magical condom. He then slowly put himself back into me. Despite the fact that this was another position for the camera, I was able to feel more pleasure. As Neville pushed his inches into me he grabbed the hair that was falling down the side of my face so the camera could clearly see that it was still me.

As the pace rapidly increased, Neville warned about cuming soon.

"Try to hold on" I requested "A little more and then we can cum together."

As a trained pornstar, Neville knew to reach over me and massage my breasts to increase my simulation. It allowed us to then cum together like a happy couple.

Neville pulled out and gave me a passionate kiss.

"That was great sweetie" I recited "Do you want to stay the night?"

"Of course I do" replied Neville

He then spooned me, making sure that it was done in such a way that my tits and pussy were facing the camera. We then each faked to dose off to sleep.

"Cut!" yelled Luna "That's a wrap!"

Luna then approached me with a suitcase. "Here is the thirty thousand gallons as promised." stated Luna "You can use a counting spell if you'd like, I won't take it personally."

Normally I would have trusted Luna but with my current financial situation and the deviance associated with the work that I just did I had to use a counting spell. To my surprise there was not thirty thousand gallons but thirty thousand and five hundred gallons.

Noting the surprise on my face Luna said "What can I say? You did good, and we are going to make a tone of money when we edit this and start selling this sex tape by the end of the night."

"You finish them that fast?" I asked in shock

"Yup" replied Luna proudly "Now get some clothes on because when I talked to you about a week ago it seemed pretty clear that you have some job hunting to do."

"Of course" I replied while putting my clothes back on. I then spent a second to thank Lavender and Neville for there good work on set and took the floo network to get back home.

The next day Crookshanks dropped a fresh edition of Witch's Weekly (a gossip magazine) from Luna in front of me. I opened the magazine to the place that Luna specifically bookmarked for me to an article titled: "A new Hermione Granger sex tape released! Six reasons why we are sure this one is real!"

I couldn't help but smile. This wasn't the first time that Witch's Weekly claimed that they had an authentic sex tape of me, but this was the first time they really did see me and not an imposter, have sex.


End file.
